Ian Fleming actually made several attempts to bring James Bond to the small (TV) and big (movie) screens before the making of Dr. No. In one of these early attempts, Fleming met with movie producer, Kevin McClory, and screenwriter, Jack Whittingham, and sketched out a movie script for what was hoped to be Bond's first screen adventure. When the plans for the picture fell through, Fleming reworked the script into the novel Thunderball. McClory, believing that he was the main mover in creating the plot of this book, sued Fleming when it was published. The suit was settled with Fleming receiving rights to the book and McClory ending up with rights to any movie based on the book. Later when Eon productions wanted to make a movie version of Thunderball they approached McClory to participate in bringing the story to the screen. McClory, however, didn't permanently surrender his rights to the story, and after a certain number of years had passed after the making of Thunderball he set out on a quixotic journey to bring his own version of Bond to the big screen. The end result of that journey is the present object of interest - the renegade Bond movie Never Say Never Again.
Since McClory only had rights to a remake of Thunderball, what we have here is essentially the same movie. The plot of the movie is practically identical. The characters are the same but for minor name changes. James Bond is the same. It's doubtful that this movie would have ever been green lighted if it hadn't been for Sean Connery's desire to try the role one more time. Even ancillary aspects of this movie are the same. Do you want to see a bunch of slowly circling sharks? We have those here. Do you want to see Bond flying around on a goofy jetpack contraption? We have jetpacks here. Do you want to see the cutting edge of toupee technology that allows a rug to cling to a man's head underwater? Well, I'm sure you get the idea. When I first sketched out this countdown in fact, I was thinking of calling a draw here between the two films. Upon rewatching the two recently, however, I have to admit that I'm just fonder of this one. Connery plays Bond pretty much the same in both films, but the fact that this is a one off production allows for a little fun to be poked at him because of his advancing age. Connery's Scottish accent has also gotten as thick as oatmeal haggis in the intervening years. It's worth watching the movie just to hear him say things like "Whatsh the American'sh shtory on how the damn thingsh got shtolen [sic!]?" It is interesting and amusing to see a different take on the secondary characters that make up British Secret Service here. And finally I think that the lead actors and actresses are all just a bit better here than their counterparts from the earlier film. If one weren't desirous of novelty and were to disagree on my judgment regarding the thespic talent on display here, I could see where my respective ranking of the two films would be debatable. What's not debatable, however, is that this film shares with its predecessor the curse of just not being very exciting. Thus while I think the novelty of the production sets it apart, once the novelty has worn off there's really not much to recommend a repeat viewing.
I was also somewhat disturbed to discover upon a repeat viewing that while this film eliminates much of the bloat of the earlier outing, it does so by eliminating a great deal of the plot. While there is really no teaser here per se, after failing at a training exercise in the early minutes of the film Bond is sent to the health clinic, Shrublands, to get back in shape. At least this time around there are no mysterious bandaged men, and Connery isn't sexually assaulting any nurses. The movie's plot hews a little closer to the source novel and just has SPECTRE paying off a NATO officer to help with stealing two atomic bombs. The NATO officer, Jack Petacchi, has undergone surgery on his eye to enable him to pass a retinal scan and have two live bombs substituted for dummy warheads in a training exercise. The stitched together eye, by the way, is a pretty disturbing bit of make-up work. It's truly ghastly to behold. After the launch, SPECTRE is able to throw the bombs off course to land at a recovery point of their choosing. In this less lavishly budgeted version of the story, a depiction of a ditching plane was apparently not considered worth attempting. This is a bit of a disappointment here because even though there were far too many underwater scenes in the original film, the Vulcan's crash landing was the only really interesting one of the bunch. Bond gets suspicious of Petacchi after seeing him practicing with a retinal scanner in his room at Shrublands. A little snooping around his room turns up a pack of matches with the insignia of Largo (first name Maximillian here) on the front. When Bond learns that Petacchi went missing after the bombs did, he's off to Nassau to snoop on Largo because of the matchbook.
It's at this point that the movie gets episodic to the point of plotlessness. While Bond is hanging around in Nassau asking questions about Largo, attempts are made on his life by the Fiona Volpe character - here entirely renamed Fatima Blush. After dodging these Bond learns Largo has left for France, so he's off to Europe in pursuit. Petacchi's sister Domino is still Largo's mistress in this film and Bond attempts to make contact with her here as well. While his approach to Domino was ham-fisted in the earlier film, here it's downright creepy. Bond actually poses as her masseuse, and asks her a lot of questions while stroking her naked back. When she finds out about the deception, I think she's a little too nonchalant given the circumstances. Later, Bond crashes one of Largo's charity affairs and beats him at a ridiculous looking computer game. If anything irrevocably dates this film, it's this scene. Not only does the game itself look ridiculously low tech in retrospect, but Bond taking a few bucks off Largo over a glorified Space Invaders machine definitely does not substitute for a scene at the gaming tables.
As if the video game scene isn't silly enough, next we see Bond giving up his winnings for a dance with Domino. Probably unbeknownst to the filmmakers, their ensuing dance provides one of the biggest unintentional laughs in the series. For one thing, the Tango was just a poor choice of dance. The two of them strutting around and throwing their heads from side to side just seems bizarre in a Bond movie in and of itself. Making the entire thing completely hilarious is the fact that Bond has used the dance to get Domino alone and tell her that her brother is dead - possibly on Largo's orders! Domino's look of astonishment is not only priceless, but also eerily similar to mine at this point. Upon hearing this all she can do is stand there with mouth agape like she's just been pole axed. Then when Bond tells her to keep dancing (!), she just lets him drag her around while casting panicked, frightened looks in either direction. And who in the world can blame her? Some weirdo poses as a masseuse to feel her up, and then shows up at her house looking for an excuse to tell her about her brother's death. I have to think her reaction is actually rather restrained given the circumstances.
Soon after this Bond is captured by Largo while snooping around his yacht. Bond talks Domino into kissing him (I tell you, Bond has stalker written all over him in this film!) in order to entice Largo out of his control room. Bond gets off a signal for help, but is subsequently imprisoned in irons at Largo's North African home. British intelligence receives the signal and Bond's pal Felix Leiter arrives to help Bond and Domino escape. They guess that Largo is taking one of the bombs to the Middle East to a location marked on a pendant Largo gave Domino earlier in the film. This is where that crazy man-made earthquake idea arises again! We're supposed to think that detonating the bomb underground will create some massive earthquake that will destroy the oil fields of the Middle East. I didn't buy it for A View To A Kill, and I don't buy it here. To rap things up, Bond and Leiter catch Largo and his men moving the bomb underground and Bond sets off after him in pursuit. Needless to say, the detonation of said bomb is prevented by Largo's taking a spear in the side courtesy of the vengeful Domino.
Blofeld fans will mark this film as his very last appearance on the big screen. This time out he's played by Max von Sydow. Blofeld is still petting that white cat, but this time out the guy is as hirsute as a Confederate cavalry commander. Von Sydow is a little too avuncular to be very intimidating here, but it is still a bit part at best so I can't complain about his performance. The main villain here is again Largo and Klaus Maria Brandauer's portrayal of him I believe to be more successful than Celi's. The fact that Brandauer is an Austrian spares us from expectations of a Mafiosi wise guy persona that Celi's casting demanded in the earlier film. Brandauer lacks the brutishness of Celi, so there is a distinct lack of physical menace in his portrayal. We certainly wouldn't expect him to last long trading punches with Bond. On the other hand, I just found it far easier to believe that Brandauer was a wealthy socialite. Unlike Celi, he doesn't seem the least bit out of place in eveningwear at formal parties. In addition while Celi's calm-speaking low-key portrayal diminished Largo's menace in the earlier film, Brandauer's calm speaking creates the opposite effect here. Largo's demeanor here is one of overwhelming condescension to those he regards as inferior. To note the effectiveness of this just note the difference between the gambling scenes in the two films. Celi's hexing hand gesture directed toward Bond at the card table just manages to make Largo seem petulant. After Largo loses at a game here he simply dismisses Bond with a wave of the hand, a broad smile and a casual "Bye". This condescension is far more effective in my mind at getting across the requisite amoral arrogance demanded in the Bond villain.
Also used to much better dramatic effect in this film is Largo's rage at his betrayal by Domino. Here, Domino hasn't even sexually betrayed Largo at the time of his tantrum. Although she is becoming convinced that Largo killed her brother, all she has done by the time Largo's yacht arrives in North Africa is to help Bond send out a signal for help. Brandauer is great as his confrontation with Domino unfolds (and Kim Basinger is no slouch here either). First, he hands her what he says is a fabulously expensive statue that was planned as her wedding gift, and then he forces her hands apart so that it smashes on the ground. Next, in one of the most cringe-inducing scenes in the series, he plants a gloppy kiss on her and pulls back to leave a bit gout of spit hanging off her mouth! Yuck! His barely repressed psychosis understandably reduces Domino to tears and trembling. This whole scene is disturbingly realistic and worlds away form Auger's wooden indifference and Celi's learned digression on heat and cold in the earlier film. And this is not the only time in the film that Brandauer's semi-controlled madness makes for a chilling scene. Earlier in the film when Domino somewhat jokingly asks what he would do were she to leave him, he chuckles and tells her he'd slit her throat. Brandauer is not enraged and he's not a cackling psychotic in the scene, merely chillingly ambiguous as to whether he's capable of such a thing. For the most part, villains in the Bond series have intentionally tended towards being larger-than-life caricatures rather than plausible flesh and blood villains. Brandauer in this movie manages to get beyond the strictures of Bond villainy and present an all too plausible and human villain who is no less menacing due to the fact.
Also far better in my eyes than her counterpart in Thunderball is Kim Basinger's Domino. While her early scenes are quite unnecessarily and obviously played sans bra, her performance as a whole here certainly doesn't constitute a skeleton in this Oscar winner's closet. I've already dealt with some of her best bits of acting in the film in the form of her final confrontation with Largo and her obvious anxiety at Largo's casual references to violence. And while I've mentioned that the Tango scene is unintentionally hilarious, Basinger's acting can't be faulted in the slightest. Part of the reason the scene is as funny as it is is due to the fact that Domino's reaction to Bond's wacky behavior and claims is all too realistic given the circumstances. The only problem I have with Domino at this point has nothing to do with Ms. Basinger's work here or even Ms. Auger's earlier. The problem in this film and the earlier one is that Domino's role is just to small to do the character or the actress playing her any justice. Given the quality of Ms. Basinger's performance and the definite dramatic tension created between Domino and the pathologically jealous Largo here, it's an especial shame here. The problem is that Domino is never given enough time to develop beyond the obvious pre-conceptions that the audience has about her being a kept woman. Basinger's Domino is never made out a ditz by the script, but our early introduction comes in the form of her doing aerobics on Largo's yacht. The strong impression is that all Domino does all day is lounge around the house/yacht with occasional breaks for shopping and spending money. Later Bond has to impersonate the masseuse at a health club to make contact with her, so we can add breaks from shopping and loafing in the form of being pampered at pricey spas to her list of daily activities. Domino is just not given enough screen time to rebut the notion that in essence she is just a gold-digging free spender that only stays with Largo because he's loaded. Fleming's Domino managed to be appealing because in the novel Fleming was able to go into detail about her background and the reason she was with Largo. Without this background in the movie it's only Ms. Basinger's ability to project likeability that allows us to warm to the character.
Now I don't know if overt comic-book extravagance is what people want in a Bond film. Nonetheless, here the said extravagance also lets Ms. Carrera be completely feminine in practically every one of her scenes. Here we are totally spared the butch and manly game of sexual one-upsmanship that marred the earlier film. We get none of the "I didn't really enjoy it" coldness in the wake of intimacy this time out. In fact, this time out the confrontation between Bond and Blush is cleverly scripted to have Bond play on her vanity to get the upper hand. When Blush has the drop on Bond and is preparing to put an enormously large caliber bullet in his groin, he is able to stall for time by implying that his romantic interlude with her was the best time of his life. Now I apologize to the ladies reading this for bringing it up, but there's a reason for the old saying about vanity's name being woman. It's a mark of the ridiculousness of the character in general that it is not really possible to imagine a real woman as assassin at all, so I can't really look for anything resembling realism here. Still, I just find something intrinsically more feminine and real in Blush's preening vanity than in Volpe's cold and indifferent dismissal of any feelings for Bond in the wake of intimacy. Thus while I've already said that Ms. Paluzzi's performance allowed for some decidedly erotic moments, the forcing of her character into mannish mode in their aftermath ruined her appeal. Ms. Carrera is spared that handicap here and consequently never becomes unappealing and unpleasant, only in a higher sense as superfluous as the character.
I've refrained from discussing truly secondary characters in detail up until now, but some mention is warranted here given the renegade nature of the production. Part of the enjoyment of this movie stems from seeing the different take on well-known characters from the franchise. Edward Fox plays "M" in this film as a pompous stuffed shirt and he is a hoot to watch. Swinging between uncontrolled bluster and a befuddled cluelessness throughout the film, he steals every scene he's in. I also got a kick out of Alec McCowen's portrayal of the Secret Service's armorer, Algernon. Here we are spared the repressed hostility between Bond and "Q" that is typical in the franchise films and instead treated to genuine goodwill and some funny griping about how under funded the armory is, how inept the bureaucrats running the place are, and how the dampness of the lab plays hell with "Q"'s sinuses. I also liked the fact that the armory here isn't presented as some antiseptic white walled laboratory, but far more realistically as a grungy machine shop. I also want to give credit to the filmmakers and scriptwriters for attempting to do some justice to the character of Felix Leiter this time out. Portrayed as Bond's best friend in Fleming's books, Felix Leiter is a major character in most of the novels. Yet while he appears frequently throughout the films, it's almost always as a bit part played by a different and far-too old character actor from film to film. While it was probably necessary to make Bond more of a lone wolf for the films, it's still good to see Leiter here mixing it up with the villains at Bond's side for the finale. While black ex-footballer Bernie Casey is as far from the description of Leiter as a lanky, blond-haired Texan in the books as it's possible to get, his charismatic and good-natured performance as Bond's friend here is another small point in this movie's favor. This is one of the few times in the series that we see the two working closely together and showing some of the camaraderie that was on regular display in the novels.
It's really kind of sad that despite containing some good performances all around, the movie really fails to deliver on the action front. There is really not all that much that is exciting in the film and what there is just doesn't match up to the stunt work found in the Moore films that were being made at the same time. There is no pre-credits teaser in this film. Rather, a teaser of a sort plays under the credits as they roll. The credits scroll by the way is the only time in the film that you really miss the typical touches found in the franchise films. I don't find naked dancing women a necessity for movie credits, but here the credits are presented in big blocky red letters that bleed all over the background action. Even on the DVD, these things are so muddy that they are nearly illegible. As the credits scroll here we are treated to scenes of Bond trying to rescue a hostage from some decidedly South American-looking banditos. Bond takes out the compound rebels with garrotes, some kind of eardrum busting grenade, and finally machine gun fire. When he enters the room in which the hostage is being held, he gets involved in a vicious head-butting smack down with a rather sizable guard. After putting that guy down, he is knifed by the hostage herself as he goes to free her. Already some goodwill has been squandered here because it now becomes clear that the whole thing was some kind of training exercise for Bond that he didn't quite pass. I really wish that action films in general would give up on this training exercise baloney. It just serves to make everything that happened seem ridiculous in retrospect. If this was just a test, then one of the best set pieces in the film was fake even in the universe of the film and any vicarious thrills it generated have been undone. And how are we to believe that these tests seem so realistic anyway? That was a particularly savage head-butt that Bond gave that guy. Are we supposed to believe that he pulled it? You just think that tests like this would only serve to make Bond a good movie stuntman rather than give him that lethal edge needed in the field. This "It was only a practice exercise" stuff that is found in action films is as unsatisfying as Patrick Duffy was stepping out of the shower at the end of the notorious "Dallas" episode.
The next Bond set-to takes place at Shrublands after Fatima Blush spots Bond snooping around Petacchi's room. It's implied that she calls for Lippe to come and take care of Bond. Lippe here is not the shifty tattooed guy of the earlier film, but a mountainous, bearded monster of a man who can shrug off a blow to the kidney with a free weight. Checking on the IMDB, I was somewhat surprised to learn that Pat Roach who plays Lippe here also played the hulking mechanic and equally hulking guard that Indiana Jones tussled with in Raiders of the Lost Ark and Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. The fight is again one of the best set pieces of the film and is quite inventive as it progresses. The fight ranges from room to room and from floor to floor of Shrublands. Bond becomes more and more exasperated as no amount of running or ambushing on his part allows him to get away from Lippe. Even fleeing to the kitchen to pick up weapons comes to naught as Lippe pulls out some kind of metal whip that slices knives in two. Unfortunately for the fight's effectiveness it is played entirely too light and jokey for its own good. This is most clearly seen in the perfunctory and ridiculous ending to the struggle. After the fight moves to a room filled with medicine bottles, Bond hurls his own urine sample (!) in Lippe's face and blinds him. Now I might buy for purposes of the joke that they mixed something caustic with that urine for testing, but what I don't buy is Lippe's staggering back into a rack of bottles and beakers and ending up with enough broken glass in his back to kill him. Lippe just picked Bond up a second before and hurled him into a rack of glass bottles with no apparent ill effect!
As I've already mentioned, if you want sharks here then you've got sharks. While snooping around Largo in Nassau, Bond is enticed by Blush to sail out to a nearby reef for some underwater sightseeing. Blush sticks some kind of radio transmitter to Bond's air tank. Nearby sharks, although woefully lacking frickin' "laser" beams on their heads, nonetheless sport some kind of electronic device on their skins that apparently cause them to swim towards the transmitter on Bond's back. How this would work is not at all clear, but at least I find Bond's shark-dodging here a bit better than what took place in Largo's pool in the earlier film. Here Bond swims from cabin to cabin in an underwater wreck in his attempts to flee the sharks. While the shots of sharks swimming after him aren't necessarily exciting, they make for interesting viewing as one wonders how they got the sharks to cooperate in the filming of this movie. At one disconcerting point Bond slices a ship's boom loose and the boom falls on top of a shark, pinning it to the deck. At this point, I was wondering whether or not that whole "no animals harmed in the filming" disclaimer was true for this movie. I guess it's a bit hard to feel sorry for a shark, but when you see that thing lying pinned on the deck gasping its last it makes for uncomfortable viewing. I just hope they didn't kill the poor thing for real.
Bond next jumps over to France in his tailing of Largo. Here Blush kills one of Bond's French contacts in a home of stunning architectural oddity. Bond takes off in pursuit of her on a gimmicked out motorcycle and a very substandard vehicle chase ensues. Note that when I say that the motorcycle is gimmicked out, that doesn't extend to the usual over-the-top accessories like machine guns and tack dispensers. The sole gimmicks here are jet engine boosters and some kind of grip on the front wheel that allows the bike to gain enough purchase on the bumper of the car in front to vault over it while driving. In addition to being just plain unexciting, the chase doesn't even have any kind of internal logic. At first it looks like the whole thing was an ambush, with Blush leading Bond off to be captured by SPECTRE goons. Bond is forced at gunpoint into the rear cab of a truck (why don't they just shoot him?), but escapes by using the cab's rear door as a ramp. Instead of fleeing, however, he lies in wait for the SPECTRE cars. Then as they roar past, he takes off in pursuit. At this point, he's totally outnumbered so this course of action just doesn't make any sense. He thought he was following one person to start and then dozens ambushed him, so why doesn't he just make his getaway here? As you would guess, however, he somehow manages to cause several of his ambushers to crash, but then gets ambushed (again!) by Blush in some kind of a warehouse. This again doesn't really make any sense. Did she have a second ambush planned here? Even if she did, why would Bond be careless enough to follow her into another one? As I've alluded to before things do end with a literal bang after Blush takes some kind of exploding round from Bond's fountain pen gadget, but the whole chase is very confusing and unsatisfying.
The next big set piece takes place in Largo's North African hideaway. Largo has chillingly arranged to sell Domino into slavery and imprisoned Bond in irons in one of the fort's rooms. Bond however has a ridiculous laser watch that can be used to cut through his shackles. He escapes his prison room when a guard quite conveniently opens the door to check up on him, he steals a horse, and he heads off to save Domino from the slave auction. Bond rides up to the auction block, grabs Domino, and rides off with the previously bidding tribesmen in pursuit. At least the lack of ensuing gunfire is sensibly explained by a desire on the part of the pursuers not to damage Domino. Still, I have to uncomfortably raise the issue of animal cruelty here once again. After some horse-to-horse tussling with his pursuers, Bond and Domino gallop off towards the fort's parapet and leap the horse off into the ocean below. While the distance this fall takes place through is not easy to gauge given some typically poor back-screen projection work here, I nonetheless have to ask whether or not they really forced a horse to leap into the ocean. It sure looks like that horse hit the water hard, even if one is shown swimming around unharmed soon after. Even if you don't feel sorry for that poor shark, it's really hard not to feel bad for that horse. Even if it's all some kind of a trick that doesn't involve a live horse at all, it still makes for some uncomfortable moments.
After this there's really not much in the way of excitement left. The pendant that Largo gave Domino leads Bond and Leiter off to the Middle East, and they jet over to the location on the pendant via the previously mentioned goofy looking jet pack contraptions. They discover Largo and his men in an old temple of some sort preparing to take one of the bombs underground for that ridiculous man-made earthquake plan. What follows are (yawn!) gun battles between Largo's men and Bond, Leiter and their backup. While there's nothing particularly exciting about this, as I've said I am at least happy to see Leiter in there blazing away at Bond's side. Bond spots Largo getting away with the bomb and heads off in pursuit. A not very exciting struggle takes place underwater between Bond and Largo just prior to Largo getting a spear in the side from Domino. Just as I took pains to point out the lack of excitement generated by underwater fighting in the original, I'll point out here once again that this entire affair is anti-climactic in the extreme. Not only is Largo not physically imposing enough for you to expect him to put up a good fight, but seeing two men grapple and thrash around underwater just doesn't get the adrenalin pumping.
As I pointed out with Thunderball, the problem that earlier film had was falling between two different kinds of Bond films. Not taut and realistic enough to be another From Russia With Love, it also wasn't spectacular enough to ape Goldfinger. A very similar problem afflicts Never Say Never Again. Despite some good performances and definite dramatic tension, much of the movie is played for laughs instead of for thrills. And this was even made at a time when even the light-hearted Moore films were being taken in a far more serious direction. Furthermore, as I've noted again and again tolerance for comedy in the Moore films was purchased at the cost of amazing stunt work. And while there's no doubt that this film had to be reasonably well-budgeted just to get Connery back, this whole film comes off as moderately budgeted fair. Given the modest budget, return of Connery, and good dramatic actors, it would seem that the logical thing to do would was return to the harder edged earlier films and not attempt to ape the more comedic though contemporary Moore movies. But it was not to be and like its more ponderous forbear, Never Say Never Again just doesn't quite satisfy expectations. In the end its just not serious enough qualify as classic Connery Bond, and its just not spectacular enough to qualify as entertaining Moore fare. Sadly its endearing value to the franchise is simply its novelty and not much else.
